Serenity & Thanksgiving - ENJOY!

So tonight is the first night of Hanukkah and tomorrow is Thanksgiving, a time for family, feasting, football and feeling content.

I am lucky that I don't have to prepare Thanksgiving dinner, instead I do Friday night with my family and my extended family.  In the past these large family get togethers have sometimes made me nuts, according to my daughter I go into "bitch" status, but this year I choose not to make myself nuts.

I know that my children do not believe this is possible but I am fairly sure that I can maintain calmness thanks to my ability to locate serenity in crazy situations.

I have taken this attitude with all things in my life including my marriage, my family, my friends, colleagues and the search for employment.  It has brought me contentment and sometimes happiness.

I find that if I can't fix the problem, it's better to let it go, perhaps the solution will come at a later time, if at all, some problems just can't be solved.  Up to the last few months I had a hard time believing that all problems can't be solved, but now I see that somethings are just not worth the time or effort and I just put them aside.  It has helped me find the happy place in life.

So here's to Hanukkah, Thanksgiving, Family, Friends and Food.

Enjoy, be happy and find serenity in all that surrounds you.

Finding Serenity in Every Day Mistakes

Okay, so I know that it's been quite a while since I last posted to the blog but I haven't lost my search for every day serenity - it just got a little caught up in the every day issues of life.

For this I am very sorry.  As some of you may know I have made a choice to begin a new chapter in my life.  I have started to work on the concept of a new nonprofit - we are calling it - First Light Project.   Most of my career has been spent in helping already established nonprofits find funds, do an event, run walks/runs, etc, now I am taking all of that knowledge along with lessons learned to format this new enterprise.

I am very very lucky because I already had colleagues, friends and some family who believe in what can be accomplished in this new endeavor.  I am also a little frightened and exceptionally honored to have people believe in me, it helps me to believe in myself and probably for the first time in my life I truly believe that I can accomplish this feat to head up an enterprise from the start.

As I begin the new year (yes I am Jewish), I look forward to many new challenges, new projects, new journeys and continuing to move only in a forward direction.

Each step forward should offer insight, be filled with questions, look for answers and the opportunity to breath deeply and savior each moment of each day.

The title of of this blog - Finding Serenity in Every Day Mistakes has a purpose.  Mistakes we make should never be overlooked we should keep them in mind and keep them the reason to go onto our new challenges.  If we never made a mistake then we would never learn and never move forward.  This past week that this brought home by a very insightful local small business owner, who had made a mistake in an invoice which he rectified by giving a refund that was more than the mistake.  When I tried to give him back some of the money he replied:  "If by paying you this refund I keep in mind that mistake I originally made then I will learn from that mistake and not make it again."  I left that place of business not only feeling incredibly happy with the world, but also thinking about his comment.  In our every day life we make mistakes but how we react to them is what this time of year is all about - forgiveness, finding serenity and peace in our every day lives and in our mistakes.

Learn from the mistakes, live each day to fullest, ask for forgiveness whenever it's necessary and each and every day of your life you will locate your serenity.

Serenity and Upcoming Valentine's Day

Each year I await the Valentine's Day holiday with trepidation and the knowledge that I have no romance in my life (other than what I do for myself).

31 years ago my father told my husband that he didn't need a set day of the year to tell my mother that he loves her and that they never really celebrated the holiday.  So since then - nothing.  Ever so often he remembers that it's Valentine's Day and gets a card and once he gave me a small Dove chocolate in my lunch (he was unemployed at the time and consequently home), but other than that, romance doesn't seem to be a factor in our lives.

And that's what I love about the holiday - it forces us to put some romance into our everyday lives.  I know that some people go over the top with the day, but there is a little piece of me that always hopes that even if it's not that actual day I will be surprised by romance.

My son and husband like to make fun of me because lately I have taken to reading romance novels on my Kindle, I do also read literature and the daily New York Times, but the romance novels give me a chance to believe that some day romance will find a way back into my life.

The question is what exactly is romance?  I can only say that for romance would be a gentle surprise that would make me feel completely special in the eyes of others.  I know that I have a wonderful soul, that I am caring and loving person (probably sometimes to a fault) but I also know that there are times when I feel that I am the only person that knows this about myself, sometimes the romantic surprise could make a real difference to the psyche of a person.

So for all of you out there who have romance in your lives, share with me what makes romance real to you and for all of those who find themselves in a similar boat to me - I say, have a piece of dark chocolate, a wonderful glass deep red wine, light some candles, fill the tub with hot water and bubbles and enjoy the peace that will surround you.  It's not romance but it will give the end of your day beauty.

Peace & Serenity!

Serenity & New Year's Resolutions

Well it's time for a new year and I have seen a lot written about attainable New Year's Resolutions.  So the question of the day is What is your New Year's Resolution?

I know that over the next few weeks I will be attempting to figure out what exactly I would like to accomplish in the upcoming year.  These are goals for both personal and professional.  On the personal side I know that I need to exercise more, watch what I eat and not be so willing to just roll over when I am faced with decisions allowing everyone to input their opinions on me.  It will take initiative for me to become a more decisive person.  Over my life I think that in order to not make waves or be argumentative that I simply gave in.  I have done this with both personal and professional decisions and it's making me a very unhappy human being.  So no more.

I must learn to stand my ground.  Now this doesn't mean that I won't listen to other opinions or take circumstances into consideration, but for now I must learn to believe in myself.  I cannot and will not allow people to run over my feelings, my opinions or my beliefs.  This goes for all aspects of my life.

I believe that serenity can be found daily by believing in yourself.  Through most of my life this hasn't been the case.  I was filled with self-doubt and still am even as I write this, but my goal and resolution for 2013 and for the rest of my life is to change this one aspect of my life and I truly believe that it will enhance the every day serenity I find.

A Very Happy New Year to You!!!!

Finding Serenity in a Full House

Well, it's holiday season and our neighborhoods are filled with lights, traffic, people who take the holiday spirit a little too far, nice people, grumpy people and houses filled with people.

So the question is how do you find serenity in this chaotic few weeks?

I have 2 unemployed adult children, one of whom is now living at home and the older one decided to escape from NYC and come home for a visit.  Now don't get wrong, when you have lived sans children for a couple of years having them back is fun.  I do like being able to converse at dinner (husband is on assignment in another state and comes home for the weekend), but I find that I can unexpectedly get frustrated and tense when they get loud, obnoxious and what I perceive as disrespectful.  So how can I detach from this and find my serenity and my happy place?

There are several ways I have found to disengage from the craziness.
1.  If it's late in the day a nice glass of wine in a quiet spot, if its the afternoon I will make myself a cup of herbal tea and sip it in a quiet corner with my Kindle.  I have found that when I'm frustrated, angry, tense or unhappy reading a romantic novel helps remove me from the stress and envelops me into a fantasy world for a few minutes.  Also, the characters in these stories seems to have problems much more serious than mine, so I end up feeling much better about life in general.

2. Music - I have mentioned this before but laying in a very dark room at night surrounded by soft meditation music seems to cull the stress and allow a deep sleep.

3.  Leave the house and go for a walk, especially in the evening when people have their houses decorated with beautiful lights.  I find stars, the moon and Christmas lights to be magical.

So my advice for finding serenity during chaotic times - look around you and take in the good, the beautiful, the laughter and the love.  Have a glass of wine, a cup of tea, take walk, read a romantic story and you will locate your serenity.

Happy Holidays!

Maintaining Serenity during Crisises of All Sorts

I know that it's been a while since I have last blogged about serenity - so I have a lot to say.

The past week has been incredibly hectic - first there was a trip to Pittsburgh (overnight) to see the Steelers beat the Redskins and have dinner with friends.  Then there was a Hurricane named Sandy who along with reeking havoc on the NJ shore and NYC area also impacted my scheduled closing for our new home (which is directly across the street from our rental).  The couple we purchased the townhouse from retired and wanted to move back home to Hungary.  Well with a little bit of luck and because we had no major issues, closing was held on the scheduled day just a few hours later than it was supposed to happen.  Now we own a townhouse and are still living in the rental townhouse across the street.

I must admit that moving across the street seems to be a hell of a lot easier than packing and moving across the state as we did a year and a half ago.

In the middle of all of this we deal with the every day issues - elections, heating system issues in the rental (now fixed), painters for the new home, a mother who had her 6th fall in 8 months, and my son moving back home.

Some how through all of this I have managed to maintain some small sense of serenity.  Even when my home was without heat on the main level I knew that when I climbed into bed under my covers with Sammy & Hercules at my feet (they're cats) and my Kindle I would be happy, serene and fall asleep content with the feeling that tomorrow will be better and it is.

Each day I start with a stretch, a couple of deep breaths and an excellent cup of coffee and begin again.

This is how to maintain serenity - one day at a time, one breath at a time.

I am looking forward to next week with movers, new appliances, a fabulous fundraising event for Power Up Gambia and settling into my own home, surrounded by beauty, family, pets and friends.

Maintain your Serenity each and every day

Serenity, Family and The Jewish New Year

This evening starts the celebration of Rosh Shana - the Jewish New Year.  It's a time to think about what has happened throughout the past year and look forward to the upcoming year.

This past year has brought forth a lot of change in my life - a new residence, new jobs for all of us (both kids and my husband), and health issues, but through it all I have tried sometimes successfully to maintain my level of serenity and happiness.

It has been comforting to be near my mother and sister and my children.  I have gained a lot of respect for my children both are now adults, my daughter recently changed her career path and is second in command/COO of a start-up Internet company, my son is currently an unemployed but brilliant artist whose has created posters and album art for several bands, he is currently trying to find work and applying for Master's Degree programs. I am very proud of them and honored to their mother.  Currently they are both hanging out in my living room involved in an in depth discussion of football (they are Fantasy Football opponents).

To me this is serenity - being surrounded by my family and celebrating the holidays.  As a part of this evening I will be hosting dinner at my home - it will be filled with family and friends, enjoying, eating, reminiscing, laughing and celebrating.

At this time of year I can overlook the meanness, the biting words, being ignored or dismissed and look only for the joy and happiness that I hope this year will bring.

But winning PowerBall would be a help as well.

To all that read this blog - L'Shana Tova - Happy Jewish New Year.
May your life be filled with happiness, health, joy and of course - Serenity!