Finding Serenity In Noise, Beauty, Service and the Holiday Season.

So this morning construction workers begin the tear off of my roof and it's loud and it will get even louder as the day wears on and they begin using the nail guns to put the new roof on.  So how can I find peace when old shingles and a lot of banging surround me?

The answer is quite simple actually.  I will concentrate on work, concentrate on how the new roof will keep my house dry and safe and concentrate on what the end of the day will bring.  I am exciting to say that this evening I will attend a gala dinner honoring the 100th anniversary of the International Rotary Foundation and yes I am a Rotarian and yes I believe in Service Above Self.  But more importantly than believing in the motto is demonstrating that I follow the motto.  I'd like to believe that I do.  By working towards helping others it is very possible to find serenity.  There is always a sense that helping the world, the community, the people and the environment that surround us will bring us an inner joy and a sense of peacefulness that seems to be lacking.

Serenity can be found in the beauty that surrounds us during this holiday season.  I love looking at the homes decked out in beautiful lights, I love the music playing in stores, choirs in the malls, seeing kids lined up for Santa Claus, I love the sappy old movies and even some of the newer ones - Elf is a favorite now and I love how people actually wish you season's greetings and happy holidays, even if they are strangers to you.  This is truly beautiful and it fills me with joy.

The question is why does this only seem to happen post Thanksgiving through New Year's and why can't we keep it going through out the entire year.  Okay, I understand the music and the lights but can't we keep pleasant greetings in place when we shop, dine, or bump into people on the street?  Can't we be better, more polite drivers and let people in as they change lanes or merge into the highway?

It would be my wish that we turn down the noise, turn up the joy, spread the idea of Service Above Self and bring out serenity into the community around us and into our own lives.

I leave you with this thought - find your serenity in the beauty of yourself.  Believe that with serenity surrounding you you will be able to find the beauty of the season and throughout the year.

HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

Finding Serenity in Disharmony

Serenity is sometimes very difficult to locate when the world around seems poised to be filled with discontentment and disharmony, as it has been the past couple of weeks, but now is the time more than ever to change that and find serenity in the inherent good that people can possess.

I will not bring politics into this blog, but it seems that people throughout the country we live in have gone off the rails.  Protests, hate mongering, attacks on individuals, trash talking, etc., how can we find a serene moment in this chaos?

Here are my thoughts:

First, we really need to start listening to each other, yes we all have different belief systems and yes we all have issues that we feel strongly about, but if all we do is deride the people who feel differently than we do we will never heal, we will always be at each other's throats.

Secondly we need to take a step back and look around us, not just at our neighbors or the people pushing through the grocery store or the mall, but let's look at the beauty that surrounds us each and every day.  Last night, if you looked outside there was a super, super moon - it was simply awe inspiring.  How can you not feel serene when gazing up into the night sky.  I have been amazed by the fact that until a few days ago I still had roses blooming in my yard.  That is beauty and that fills me with serenity (although, I do have to say that having flowers blooming because of global warming isn't exactly a calming thought), but beauty is beauty no matter what the reason.

Third, let's just try to be nice to one another.  I was sent an Instagram photo from We Are Love that stated the following:  "When you can't control what's happening, challenge yourself to control the way you respond to what's happening.  That's where your power is."  I believe it's also where you will locate your serenity.

If you believe in the goodness you can find within yourself and within those around you then you might be able to maintain your serenity in a world filled with disharmony.

Keep believing in serenity, I know I do.

Sadness, Serenity and Hope

Last week my cousin was killed crossing the street to catch a bus.  It was a horrifying phone call and shock spread through my being.  After a few moments I morphed into my role as one of the helpful family members, asking what I could do to help organize and get things moving forward.  The next few days were filled with a lot more phone calls, travel arrangements and trying my best to be a comfort to my cousins.   I didn't really put time away for uncovering my feelings or emotions and that was not a good thing.

The day of the funeral it was grey, but not raining yet and I was also filled with sadness since that same day nine years before my father (their uncle) had passed away.  It was a profound and deep feeling that made it hard to breathe.

The differences were there as well.  My father had been ill and passed away quietly surrounded by his immediate family, my cousin on the other hand died suddenly and unexpectedly surrounded by strangers.

How can you locate your serenity when you have a week like last week?

For a few days I didn't have the ability to locate my serenity nor did I particularly want to.  I just simply moved through the days.  That changed at the end of the week.  What was the change?  It started with going out to dinner with my sister (something we hadn't done in quite a while due to our hectic schedules) where we ate, casually toasting our father, breathing deeply and talking about our kids, doing a day trip together and the upcoming wedding of our cousin on the other side of the family.

That night I slept better than I had for 3 days.  Over the weekend I walked a trail in a local park taking photos of changing fall colors, enjoying sunshine and warm temperatures and watching ducks, geese and kids eating ice cream cones.  It was just what I needed to bring back my serenity.  It filled me with renewed hope.

Seasons change, children find joy in ducks, geese and ice cream and as adults we must move through life adapting, changing, finding our way through sadness to locate our serenity and our hope.

It's been quite a week, but now that my serenity has been located (it was probably always there, I just misplaced it for a few days).  Life is full of hope.

Can You Find Serenity When Negativity Constantly Surrounds You?

So I have this past few weeks filled with negativity.  Negativity from the candidates, negativity in the news, negativity surrounding my personal life.

A couple of days ago a friend said she didn't understand how I could be so calm with the issues that were surrounding me.  I responded with the following, "I have my moments of being bitchy, but it's only to those who are deserving of my being a bitch and then I take a deep breath and let it go." There's absolutely no reason to be angry or mean to people who had nothing to do with the problem. I wish the politicians could learn this lesson.  I wish people I deal with on a day to day basis could learn this lesson and sometimes I wish my family could learn this lesson.

On Saturday I volunteered at an Oktoberfest event that my Rotary Club sponsored.  It's a huge fundraising event for us and for the 1st time we had a rainy day (the past 3 years we have lucked out with sunny crisp fall days) but as I looked around I saw joy, fun, and lots of conversation, kids games being played, bounce houses being enjoyed and eating, drinking and dancing.  While the attendance was less than last year it was clear that the event was a success.  How does this relate to the title of this blog?  Well, here it is - my leg injury flared up, possibly due to the rain, possibly due to a lot of standing and walking, but the only way anyone would have know was that I periodically sat down to rest it.  One time was to actual eat and the other times were to take photos or video of the bands and dancers.  I was hurting but there was no reason to involve others when there was nothing they could do, why shouldn't I keep enjoying the positivity that surrounded me.  It actually made me feel better.

Writing this blog has taught me a great deal of how I interact with those around me.  If I focus on anger, pain and aggravation that's what I project onto others, but if I can instead locate my serenity then that's what I project.  If I feel content then how can others around me not feel the same?

I am a realist, I do know that there are people in this world that focus only on negativity and I can't change that so the best you can do when surrounded by those types is to not react to it.  I try to maintain my serenity, breath deep and speak calmly.  It doesn't help any one to fall into the person's negative patterns.  I WON'T DO THAT!

So when surrounded by negativity, react calmly, maintain your serenity and the person's negativity will have no place to go.

Maintain Serenity.

Life's Little Medical Bumps and Maintaining my Serenity

So for the past few months I have dealt with several somewhat small medical issues and it's been a little difficult to always locate my serenity.  The issues were not connected to each other and only one was related to being a Type 1 Diabetic the rest were all random issues.  The interesting thing has been other people's reaction to one of the issues.

The issue I am referring to was an injury to my leg which actually had been bothering me for multiple months, which has only now be correctly diagnosed and I'm on the mend, but what fascinated me was the reactions of people and people in my inner circle.  Some offered sympathy and wishes for a quick recovery, some offered advise, some offered up their own versions of similar injuries, but one person not only didn't offer advise, but harped on their own leg problem (which is on going) and offered very little assistance, but this actually made me realize that I had lost my serenity and needed to find it immediately before I lost my cool.

Finding it was easy.  Rather than wallow in anger and self-pity, I moved on and helped myself.  I rested my leg when necessary, worked on my stance and continued with my work.  One thing I have learned about locating my serenity at necessary times is that I have the power to be strong and standup for myself, something that's taken me a long time to realize and now that I have I will never ever give that part of myself up.

So when medical issues happen, when arguments occur, when people try to belittle or push you down, look into yourself, take a deep deep breath, close your eyes and locate the serenity that is within you and don't allow them in.  Stand up for yourself by being the best you can be and this will happen when your serenity comes through.

This has enabled me to always move forward and stop obsessing at what's wrong in my life.  Everyday and every night has beauty, joy and peacefulness.  You just need to locate it.

Keep cool, enjoy the evening and may serenity surround you.

Finding your Serenity when it's really really really hot!

So we are now into our 4th heat wave and this one seems to be lasting a few days longer than the last one.  It seems that when it's this hot people just loose their cool and become cranky, mean and irritated a lot more.

Luckily most of us have air conditioning available either in our homes or at a nearby cafe, library, museum or the mall.

If you have to go out here's what I think about when walking outside when it's 98º - I try to take cooling breaths and let my mind focus on my destination not the heat itself.  I also take small sips of cool water from my ever present water bottle to keep hydrated.  I am trying my best to be pleasant to people around me.  Even if it's hot there is no reason to be mean.  Even if it's not hot there's no reason to be mean.

I also have to mention that hot seems to also refer to the amount of hatred that our country and the world has continued to face pulls at my heart and my soul.  How can we continue to feed this fear and feed this hatred?  We need to mobilize our inner souls and allow peaceful conversations to replace this constant divisive behaviors. This could be an extremely exciting time for our country, a time to debate, a time to converse and a time to decide what direction we will take.

I believe in free choice, free speech, I believe in the democratic process that our country was founded on, I also believe in our right to disagree but that should be done by conversation and peaceful protests not by intimidation, not by insults and not by discrediting and demeaning each other.

We need to find our serenity as individuals, as a country and as a world.  I think we need a movement of like minded individuals who think that this time of year we need to locate our serenity.

Let's bring serenity to the conversation, let's bring serenity to the discussion, let's bring serenity to combat the hatred, the discourse, the intimidation.  Let's take a deep breath, take a sip of cool water and locate our serenity to navigate through these difficult times.

Locate your serenity each and every day!😍

Serenity & Birthday Celebrations

So it's quickly coming upon my 59th birthday and my feelings are somewhat ambivalent towards the day.  Should I be excited to celebrate or just pass the day in normal style?

Now earlier this week we celebrated the birthday of my son and I got to thinking why is that the person whose birthday it is is the one celebrating when it should really be the parents celebrating the birth.

So I celebrated my son's birth during the week and now it should be my mother celebrating my birth.
It's an interesting thought.

But what does any of this have to do with serenity? Well I think that each and every day and especially birthdays should be times of reflection and a looking forward to new beginnings.  We should be remembering the past and moving forward towards a new day.  Having a birthday should bring a person a sense of peace and serenity that we have gone from one year to the next with our souls filled with joy.

Time moves forward sometimes quickly, sometimes at a snail's pace but it moves forward and we must move with it.  So to answer my own question should I celebrate or just pass the daily normally? I will definitely celebrate!

Today I posted a photo on my Facebook with the caption - "When I get old, I don't want people thinking what a sweet old lady.  I want 'em to saying Oh Crap-What's she up to now?"

So Happy Birthday to me and to my mother!  It will be a day filled with celebration, joy, a little looking back, absolutely looking forward and all of this will bring be a day filled with serenity!

Fill your days with joy and serenity!

Serenity is Mine to Keep: Serenity, Photography and Creativity

Serenity is Mine to Keep: Serenity, Photography and Creativity: Over the past few months I have spent time getting to know my new camera.  I have had it for a little while now and am enjoying the discover...

Serenity, Photography and Creativity

Over the past few months I have spent time getting to know my new camera.  I have had it for a little while now and am enjoying the discovery of being creative.  I find that there is a sort of serenity in capturing a photo especially since I tend to focus on the nature that surrounds me.

There is a peacefulness to being able to focus intently on one very small piece of the world that surrounds us.  It's a sense of serenity that is calming and beautiful.  I find that when I have the camera in hand I notice little things that would normally just pass me by.  Or even if I don't have the camera in my hand I am finding that I look for beauty in the surrounding space.

This is a new hobby for me and I am still learning the "tricks of the trade" so to speak, but I am finding that each day I can easily look at the world with a more creative vision.

Now, I know that I will never be a professional photographer nor will my photographs be hanging in a gallery somewhere or published somewhere other than here in my blog or on my Facebook page or Twitter feed, but I'm okay with that, because I'm doing this for me and while I'm happy to share some of my photos, it's really only for my serenity.

I never really thought of myself as an artistic person.  I can be creative in my own mind but usually it doesn't translate well into reality, until now.  It seems that photography has brought forth my creative, perhaps even artistic side and that makes me happy.

So, I would like to recommend that each of us find the creative, artistic side to ourselves and produce for you and once in a while share your creativity with the world around you.  You will find that serenity will flow within and throughout you when you become comfortable with the artistic side of your personality.

Enjoy these photos and find the serenity that flows in the world that surrounds you.

Serenity and Anniversaries

On Monday I celebrated my 34th wedding anniversary, usually unless it falls on a weekend we celebrate it separately since we are rarely in the same place.  This year my husband took the day off to celebrate with me.  But unfortunately fates were against us and on Saturday he came down with a awful head-cold.

So the question of the day - how to maintain an aura of serenity when life disappoints you?

The answer - you go with the flow.  Instead of spending the day wandering around town and local museums with dinner at restaurant in town, we spent the day relaxing at home, a quick shopping trip at a local warehouse store and went out for dinner at a local sushi place.  When you're married for 34 years you learn to just go with the flow, sometimes.

Over the past couple of years I have changed my thinking about anniversaries.  For a long time I kept hoping that I would be surprised and that I would be swept off my feet with some large romantic gesture, but that isn't what marriage is really about, that's what dating is about.  Marriage is commitment, give and take, arguments, misunderstandings, forgiveness and respect.  Love is always a part of it but over-the-top romance is not always a necessity.

I read a lot of romance novels and each one is over-the-top filled with romantic situations and they are wonderful to read, but I often wonder if these books are written by people who are looking for romance in the wrong places.

If the person you married was once upon a time very romantic when you dated, why shouldn't things change.  Would you really want it to stay the same as when you were dating?

So the answer to the question how to maintain serenity when life disappoints - the best way is to acknowledge the disappointment, take a deep breath, realize that change happens and that life moves forward.

Romance isn't dead, it's simply different, it's under the surface and shown in small ways by husbands and wives or partners.  I find my serenity in this knowledge and by accepting it there is no disappointment.

Move on, Move forward, Find Serenity!

Finding Serenity When You are Exhausted.

So for the past year or so I have been having sleeping issues and no I do not have sleep apnea, but I do have issues with shutting off my brain.

I have tried really dark rooms, no noise, soft meditation music, reading boring books, etc, but still my mind won't shut down, then someone suggested that I have my hormone levels checked and sure enough there was a discrepancy, which has now been fixed with a simple cream that I put on morning and evening and for the most part I am now falling asleep relatively quick.

Last night I didn't put on the cream and I had a very rough night so today I am exhausted and exhaustion seems to make it difficult to locate my serenity, but I followed my plan for the day and this evening connected with friends and family.  This is the way to ensure the ability to find my serenity at the end of the day.

I have learned to take deep breathes, learned to enjoy small things in life.  A friend who's a great professional chef once told me that dinner should always be enjoyed even if it's just a bowl of soup and a roll.  He told me to set a place at the table, put on music, pour a glass of wine, grab a book and sit down at the table and dine - no matter what I'm eating.  I have never forgotten that advise and no matter what in the evening I dine.  It's the beginning of the process of finding serenity at the end of my day.

My mistake last night was not following my plan, instead I ate late and left on the tv so I could watch the hockey game and while I love hockey I should have known better, then I didn't spread on my cream or refill the humidifier, so I slept poorly.  Tonight I followed my plan and yes writing on my blog is part of my plan. So I truly believe that tonight I will have a great night's sleep.

I would love to hear from people who are reading my blog.  Send me a comment with how you find your serenity.

Have a great night's sleep, enjoy your meals - dine don't just eat and do your best to find serenity in all that surrounds you each and every day!

Every day life and finding my serenity.

This week has been peculiar. I have begun to question if there is a way for me to contribute in a more concrete way to my family, my community and most importantly - myself.  

It has been a week filled with self doubt - doubt professionally, doubt financially, doubt in choices and personal doubt.  It didn't happen suddenly, but has been building steadily over the past few weeks and I have to say that it has made finding my serenity a little challenging. 

At the end of each day I curl up in bed with the Kindle app on my IPad and immerse myself in cheesy romance novels. It relaxes me and allows me to disengage from reality and go sleep with a smile on my face.  

Does it remove the self-doubt? Not really, but perhaps this isn't something that should be removed. Maybe a having a little doubt in our lives is a good thing.  Perhaps it's what keeps moving forward, questioning our daily routines.

The days when we question, the days when we find doubt surrounding us are the days we must strive for the serenity.  So I will end this blog by telling you how I locate my serenity on a tough day -

    I close my eyes, breath deeply, exhale and picture something serene, usually a waterfall or an empty beach on a sunny warm day and then curl up with a trashy romance read. 

Finding my serenity doesn't remove the doubts, but it does mitigate the effects.

So recognize the doubts, but don't let them overtake you, find your serenity each and everyday.